Do you ever want to pick up the phone and dial a number but you are too big of a chicken? And then you think maybe you’ll send off an email but you remember that your last email went unanswered? So you consider sending a Facebook message but are you really that needy? So you don’t do anything but wonder.
You wonder if you did something but if you ask, “Did I do something?” you will sound like you’re fourteen years old and clueless and silly.
You review the past weeks and months and can’t pinpoint a specific event or moment that things shifted between you.
You think perhaps you’re imagining things but how do you imagine silence after years of regular contact?
Then you take things personally. How else to explain the inexplicable?
But before you embrace the pain of taking it personally, you remember that you have a tendency to take things personally when they are not personal at all.
So you think maybe you’ll pick up the phone and call but you are a big chicken.
Instead, you pull up the corners of your heart and tuck them in a little closer. You lock the front door to your life and from now on, even fewer people will be granted admission because it’s just too much to have people traipsing through or rather, it’s too much when no one even knocks at the door anymore.