Dear Lady at the Movie Theater,
Did you lose your brain? Were you born without common sense? Or are you just mean enough to bring a 3-year old to The Bourne Ultimatum, a movie rated PG-13, on a warm Saturday afternoon? What? Are the parks closed by your house? Don’t you have access to a swimming pool? Did you lose the directions to the beach? Because I cannot think of a single good reason for dragging a clearly bored 3-year old to this particular movie. What do you have to say for yourself?
Nothing. That’s what I thought. You have no excuse, no reasonable answer to my questions.
When the movie was over, you high-fived the little guy, saying, “You did it!” He might not have disrupted you too much, but he sure disrupted me. Perhaps you didn’t notice him getting up from his chair and standing those two times. Maybe you didn’t hear his whispers. Maybe you weren’t horrified by the thought of your 3-year old boy’s eyes taking in the violent fighting and action sequences. But I was.
I am horrified that there are people like you in the world who bring small children into movie theaters on sunshiny Saturdays and expose them to images that are scary and inappropriate for a child’s eyes. I am horrified that you do not consider how rude it is to bring a child into a theater full of people who left their own children behind so they could enjoy a movie in peace . . . and have it be interrupted by your child. Are you familiar with the concept of a babysitter? That’s when you hire someone you trust to watch your child in your absence. Try it! You’ll like it!
Anyway, Lady in the Movie Theater, I hope you enjoyed your movie and I hope your little boy didn’t wake up with nightmares. Actually, I hope he did because that would serve you right and hopefully teach you a lesson. STOP BRINGING YOUR KID INTO MOVIES FOR ADULTS!
The Lady One Seat Over Who Kept Glancing at Your Kid and Rolling Her Eyes
p.s. The movie was good, very entertaining. I also saw Rescue Dawn last week which was also excellent, toned down a little for a lower rating, I think, but an amazing story nonetheless. And last week, a lady WITH A BABY in her arms sat one seat away from me. And yes, as you can imagine, that was annoying and also very distracting. I was thankful she left mid-way through the movie. What is WRONG with people?!