A warning to you because I care (and when I say “you,” of course, I mean “me.”)

The problem with taking an hour-long nap at 7 p.m. is that you might still be awake at 1:30 a.m. and not even feel like yawning.  Which will turn out to be a bummer seven hours from now when you have to get yourself together and take your daughter to school and then drive straight to your hair-stylist’s house to get your highlights touched up and your ragged hair trimmed.

However, you will be glad your hair looks okay because that is one less thing to worry about when you fly to Grand Rapids on Wednesday.  By the way, do you realize how long it takes to travel to Grand Rapids on a Wednesday?  You will leave your house at 8:30 a.m., fly out at 11 a.m., and finally touch down in Grand Rapids at 8:51 p.m.  By the time you get to your hotel room, it will be 10 p.m. or later, but your brain will still be in the same time zone you left, even though your body temporarily resides in Eastern Standard Time.  Good luck getting to sleep!

But back to your hair.  At least it will look okay, freeing you up to worry about more important things like your weight.  And whether or not your creativity has atrophied to the point that you can no longer carry on a coherent conversation or think thoughts worthy of all the trouble it took you to get to Grand Rapids for that particular conference.

So, in summary:  Please do not take a 7 p.m. nap or you’ll throw your entire week out of alignment.  Good luck with that.

3 thoughts on “A warning to you because I care (and when I say “you,” of course, I mean “me.”)

  1. I was one of those toddlers who refused to take naps once I hit around the age of 2. My mom still insisted I lay down quietly for a while, tho, probably just to keep her sanity, ha! I’d never been much of a nap-taker until recently when it began to be the only way I could get grandson Dylan to nap as he’s getting older. Some days I do sleep, some days I don’t, but just that quiet bit of time does wonders. And, yes, sometimes it messes with my night-time sleep too but oh well. I get my energy from whatever source I can find! And I’m STILL green with envy you get to meet Judy…tho I had a dream I met her last nite, walking down a street and hearing someone yell “Kris!”, only to turn around and seeing her wave at me from about a block away, haha! And your mom and I are now Friends on Facebook…funny how these things work out, isn’t it? Enjoy your trip, Mel, and fuhgeddabout your weight, girl. I will never see the lower side of 150 again…at least I don’t think so. But who cares?!


  2. Even though I’d really love to, I don’t do naps for a variety of reasons. Number one on the list is the thought of being unconscious and utterly helpless while my five-year-old roams freely. I can imagine him pouring the cat’s water in my ear, or setting up a lego castle on my stomach. Fear keeps me going during the day.


  3. If you read French Women Don’t Get Fat, you know it’s all about the hair. The rest can be temporarily ignored.


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