A life of glamour and papercuts. Well, no glamour and just one papercut.

I’ve been home for two days now and haven’t cooked a decent dinner yet.  It’s not that I don’t want to cook a decent dinner.  The problem is a lack of planning and time.  Tomorrow I am going to plop some frozen chicken breasts into the Crock-pot first thing in the morning (at the crack of 9 a.m.) so we will have cooked protein around dinner-time.  Maybe I will even transform that into an actual meal, complete with vegetables and complex carbohydrates.  Imagine!  But don’t get too excited because it might not happen.

Tuesday nights are complicated.  I work until 5:00 p.m.  My son has to be at football practice at 5:30 p.m.  My daughter has to be at soccer practice at 6:00 p.m.  Tonight, my husband came home at 5 p.m. (early!) to take our son to practice. (And see?  How could I provide dinner to anyone when I wasn’t even home until 7:00 p.m.?)

You should know that at 4:00 p.m., I said to my son, “Do you know where your practice pants are?”  He said that, of course, he did.  And then, at 5:00 p.m., he did not.  He.  Did.  Not.  So, I sprang into action, upending laundry baskets, digging through folded clothes, pawing through dirty clothes.  As a last resort, I ran into my own room and asked my husband:  “Do you know where Zach’s pants are?”

“They are in the bottom of that basket.”

And sure enough, they were.  Filthy knees, possibly stinky.  I didn’t sniff.  And off he went to practice in dirty clothes.

Then, at 5:50 p.m., I said to my daughter, “We have to get ready!”  We hurried upstairs so she could pull on her shin guards and cleats.  Except, of course, that the cleats were gone.  The shin guards were neatly tucked into her closet next to all her lined up shoes.  Minus the soccer shoes.

I began a frantic search for the cleats.  I was gone when she wore them on Saturday and had no idea where they might be.  I expected them to be in the closet.

I ran laps in the house, searching in all the obvious and ridiculous places (under the kitchen table, inside the dirty laundry basket, on her bed).  I was sweaty and annoyed and frustrated.  Finally, at 6:05 p.m., I called my husband at football practice.  “Do you know where Grace’s soccer shoes are?”

“Oh yeah.  They’re in the van.”  The van he had with him at the football field.

That noise you heard at 6:05 p.m. PST was me screaming.

So, while we waited for him to deliver the shoes, we sat in the car outside in the driveway.  I checked the mailbox and found a small stack of mail.  I stood by the car and sorted it, then opened the first envelope.  And that is how I acquired a large, painful paper cut on my index finger.

We arrived at soccer practice fifteen minutes late.  My finger was still bleeding.  What did I do to deserve all this?  (Besides not cooking a proper dinner for days?)

8 thoughts on “A life of glamour and papercuts. Well, no glamour and just one papercut.

  1. Frozen lasagna. Broccoli.

    Pre-made hamburger patties.

    Fish sticks. Beans.

    Banquet pot pies. Potatoes. Carrots.

    Tuna salad sandwiches.

    Deli meat sandwiches.


  2. Seriously.

    I can hardly recall when dinner wasn’t handed to me through a drive-up window.

    Homemade hamburgers do not look ‘right’ unless I sit on them first.

    Sorry about your paper cut.


  3. Mel – this only happened so you could keep up with the seasons – ’tis the time for wind, cold, rain outside. Storms. Inside? It’s even worse – it’s for lost items, less time between when something happens and when we’re ready (as is Daylight Savings Time which brings darkness into our worlds – again), lost items (I DID say that before, right?), and perhaps lost sanity.

    Fun; coming back from time away from family – spent instead with girlfriends!


  4. Soccer is the worst time of year, we eat out more during these two months than we do the whole rest of the year.

    I hear you on the missing cleats. I don’t know why my lovely, intelligent children don’t get that you don’t leave soccer stuff in dad’s car, because he will not be home with it when you next need to go to practice.

    Grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup.

    And if you haven’t got your twins cooking dinner for you yet, you need to do that. Your future daughters in law will love you!


  5. Recent samplings from my kitchen at dinnertime:

    cereal and milk
    microwaved Velveeta on soft tortilla shell
    barbecue potato chips and bologna sandwiches
    raw carrots, Ranch dressing and boxed mac and cheese

    And my best moment…freezer burned frozen pizza

    I think I could get arrested for child endangerment for serving up this slop….but the police would have to catch me between running boys to football practice, music rehearsals and youth group! : )


  6. ’tis the richness of life you have. It’s the seasoning to the recipe that is family. This is heartwarming to me.

    As for dinner: when faced with no good option, we usually go with popcorn and ice cream.


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