Okay, well, I’m not a watch. Today I am just a harried housewife with an absent husband. He went to Michigan to an unofficial college reunion, which I think is fantastic for him. How lucky is he that he still has twenty friends from college who take time out to get together for a (very) long weekend? So, three cheers for him and now he owes me one. Or maybe we’re even. Something like that.
In an attempt to be helpful, he drove himself to the mall and took the shuttle to the airport. He left at 5 a.m. or some ungodly hour, so that was kind of him, right? He arranged for a friend of ours to pick up the van from the mall and drive it to our driveway . . . leaving me out of the loop entirely. Fantastic, right? Except that he locked the keys in the van. Do we have a spare key? Why, of course! It’s on the key-ring that is locked in the van because doesn’t everyone just put all their keys on one ring? Anyone?
Well, so, now I have to go hang out at the mall parking lot long enough for AAA to come and unlock the door for us. How long can that take? An hour? Two? Fifteen minutes? I don’t know, but I do know that tomorrow is a long day for me (I work three shifts, 8 a.m. to 11 a.m., phone conference from 11:45 a.m. to 12:15 p.m., 1 p.m. to 5 p.m., 9 p.m. to midnight–guess what I’ll be doing between 5 p.m. and 9 p.m.?).
By the way, has anyone seen the forks? What forks? The forks that belong in my kitchen drawer. Try as I might, I can only find two forks in the house. We are all reduced to eating with the small forks, which I think are meant to be dessert forks, if we were hoity-toity. However, I always consider those “kid forks,” and make the kids eat with them except now I eat with them, too, because where are all the forks? Did the dish run away with the fork? Are the forks hiding somewhere with the unmated socks? Are my forks participating in a practical joke on someone’s lush lawn?
Actual Unretouched Photo 
No, your forks are off cavorting with all my teaspoons somewhere.
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Oh my gosh- sounds like something that would happen to me. I always leave my keys in the car- hey- so much easier to find them! And you might want to check your VCR. I found two forks in ours last time I went to use it. And also, in highschool my house got forked. But they used plastic. So un-eco friendly of them.
Steph
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I couldn’t find forks a while back either. I got the bright idea to go to a Dollar Tree store and buy some if they had some. 4 for a dollar! Not the fanciest but they ARE metal. And they work.
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I thought the dish ran away with the spoon. Could be that my youngest son found them, he like to bend them up. How you wander? and so do I.
I hope you have those keys and the van by now.
Ooops just thought of something- when the calendar said Earth Day the aliens came by and your forks were magnetically drawn up to their flying saucer. There that’s it the forks ran away with the saucer.
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Spoons. We loose spoons. Forks too, but mainly spoons. It drives me nutty too. Do folks keep their fork and spoon when they come for dinner?
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Mel, those small forks (“baby” forks in my house) are salad forks. My silverware disappears, too. Perhaps the forks have formed an alliance with the socks that the dryer eats? Maybe?
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Your dinner forks have run off with my tablespoons, I can only find two of them! I haven’t been around for a while. Tell your mom that March must have been the month for loosing mother’s. I lost mine on the 10th. Of course she was just a young thing of 87! It is the hardest thing, give your mom my love and heart felt sympathy.
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