Balance

Uncategorized 1 Minute

What’s fun is waking up in the darkest of dark nights and realizing two things:

1)  You are still cold, even though you’ve been huddled under the covers since 11:00 p.m.

2)  That sound you heard was the sound of someone coughing and vomiting.

But, good news!  Although she’s only 4, I found her standing over toilet, retching and vomiting into the toilet bowl.  Hooray.

But, bad news.  “Did you throw up anywhere else?” I asked. 

“On the floor,” she said.

And then I stepped in it.

But, good news!  She settled back into bed and went right to sleep.

But, bad news!  She woke up a few hours later, thus waking me up.

But, good news!  She did not throw up again!

And more good news:  I went back to bed after my 8-year old left for school.  

But, bad news!  One of my 13-year old twins woke up in the dark hours of the night and threw up.

More bad news:  he threw up on the bathroom floor.

But, good news!  He cleaned it up!

But, bad news!  He did not flush.

More bad news:  The toilet was clogged.

But, good news!  I plunged it and the water receded.

But, bad news!  The bathroom stunk.  (Stank?  Stunk?  Stank?  Huh.  I can’t decide.)

But, good news!  Now it smells better because I bought a new mop the other day and a quick mopping and toilet cleaning worked a miracle.

And more good news!  I declared this a sick day.  And worked on taxes.

But, bad news:  My 13-year old felt ill all day.

But, good news!  My daughter felt much better and begged me for Cheetos.  (Uh, no.)

But, bad news!  My 8-year old complains that his stomach hurts.

But, good news!  Soon, I get to drop into bed and sleep, hopefully all night long.  And I feel great!

My life is so balanced, is it not?

Now, pass the hand sanitizer and spray every surface in your house with Lysol, just in case.

Unknown's avatar

Published by Mel

Published

14 thoughts on “Balance”

  4. I’m so sorry! We had that about 2 weeks ago, went through everyone here! At least you sound all upbeat and finding the positives in your day! Have a wonderful day (sleep, rest, spray lysol…buy the stock…hmmm…)

    Like

    Reply

  5. So sorry to laugh at your misfortune, but oh WOW that is some funny stuff! Makes me want to wash my hands RIGHT NOW-and use germex for good measure. Hope your household is feeling better soon!

    Like

    Reply

  6. Bad news: you spent a nearly sleepless night.
    Good news: it wasn’t me!

    My hubby and kids were sick LAST week with that cr*p….and I hated every minute of it. Sorry for your misfortune, but I’m oh so glad I’ve seen the end.

    Like

    Reply

  8. Yes, my child has come into the living room or bedroom during the night to report that he felt he was going to throw-up. Of course, that meant he did, and on the floor. I always have to clean it up, too, because hubby has that sympathy vomit thing going.

    Like

    Reply

  9. Mine only ever used to lean out of the bed – woe betide any library book, telephone, shoes, or cat that happened to be there. And my eldest is 18 and still doesn’t recognize the warning signs – he got travel sick the other weekend and (good news) opened the car window and stuck his head out, but (bad news) he didn’t face backwards so it hit him in the face. We were on our way to a family meal out as well. Yuck. Sorry – you didn’t need to know that did you.
    Healing vibes across the ocean.
    E
    xx

    Like

    Reply

  10. One night my father was sound asleep in bed when my 5 year old brother came into the bedroom, stood above my dad’s face and declare matter of factly “I’m going to throw up.”

    My father instinctively jumped out of bed, grabbed him with one arm and ran towards the toilet. In the process of this, my dad’s little foot got caught in between the bathroom door and the door frame, which resulted in a loud cracking noise and a excrutiatingly painful, dangling pinky toe.

    My dad, though out of his mind with pain, thought that, at the least, he got the sick child to the toilet “just in time”. After a few seconds of staring blankly at the toilet, my brother turned to my dad and cheerily announced “False alarm!” and went back to his bed.

    My father had to have surgery on his toe and wear one sneaker to work for two months. I think he would have felt a bit more heroic if my brother had vomited just a little….

    Like

    Reply

You know you want to comment here: