Last night, I watched the Barbara Walters interview with Terri Irwin, the widow of Steve Irwin, the “Crocodile Hunter.” I cried. Then I cried again. Then I cried some more. I went to bed at 11 p.m. with red-rimmed eyes and a stuffy nose.
When I watched 8-year old Bindi speak at her 44-year old father’s memorial service, I wept. At least I had my father for 24 years. To have your father–especially that particular larger-than-life father–for only 8 years is so wrong.
My husband is 45-years old. I cannot imagine losing him. I cannot imagine my children losing him. I know that happens–my own father left me fatherless–but it’s still unimaginable to me.
All of this–the interview, the anniversary of my own father’s death, the child’s voice speaking about her father–perhaps even the sliver of moon in the sky and the impending change of seasons–has left me undone with a tight place in my throat that will not unclench.
This world is so breathtaking, so heart-wrenching, so beautiful and with such potential for loss and pain. When I glimpse the sunset pink on Mt. Rainier, I wonder if I might ever see that sight again. Will I see the moon grow full and round? Someday, will I watch my daughter become a mother herself?
This feeling will wash away in the tide of mundane life. I know it will, but for the moment, I’m sad.
Actual Unretouched Photo 
(((Mel)))
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Hi,
I’m a lurker from Australia. I watched the australian interview with Terru Irwin the other night was also very moved. It feels like we’ve lost an important piece of our Australian landscape.
I wasn’t a huge Steve Irwin fan and we haven’t made it to Australia Zoo yet but he was a truly amazing human being as is his wife. My 5 year old son and I wept as they packed up his ute at the end of his memorial service last Wednesday.
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When we watched Oprah and her New Orleans project, we noticed that most families seemed fatherless. It made me very sad.
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I think Bindi Irwin is one sweet gal. Her Daddy will certainly watch over her. But I’m with you. The whole thing made me cry, too.
Suz
http://suzannebalvanz.blogspot.com/
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Realization of the end for all of us is sad indeed, it is for that, that we journey. It is something not to be lingered on. Keep searching for the beauty in everything, live as if there is no tomorrow. Be happy in all things and with all things there is a blessing that can be found.
{hugs}
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Today I had to use the ‘system restore’ function on my computer.
It made me want a ‘system restore’ button for my life.
Just choose a date on the calendar when things were running along smoothly, and restore the system of my life to that date.
Yes. That’s what I want.
I could not watch that interview. I still need awhile to pretend it didn’t happen.
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I was so moved by this interview as well. Our family is a huge fan of Steve’s and he made you feel like you knew him. To see Terri speak with such courage, faith and love for him and for her family made me cry so hard, too, but it also gave me some peace seeing that she has the will to go on and overcome the grief.
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I just wish I could hug you after reading that….
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Terri is awesome… I have been as much a fan of hers as I have of Steve. I have offered many prayers on her behalf, and her children, and Wes, and Steve’s family.
I am grateful for people like Steve and Terri Irwin.
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I too watched the interview and was weepy…
My dad abandoned us and has been out of our lives for several years and sometimes I wonder if…
It’s a hard thing for children to not have a dad around to watch and love while growing up!
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Absolutely beautiful, Mel.
And, yes, sometimes life is just sad, isn’t it?
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Hi I loved Steve and you really did a great job of saying alot of the things I also have been struggling with in dealing with other people in my life who have passed on. Very nicely put. I can’t help but wondering what we will see from Terri and Bindi in the future.
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I am not sure why I watch Oprah but I do and I always end of crying, like the one on the Edwards family loosing their son 8 yrs ago. My husband says I should watch something happy :). My heart goes oout to the Irwin family as well, the children esp.
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Oh I was just like you- cried and cried some more (especially the part with Bindi and when Terri spoke of baby Robert wanting to fix that motorbike so daddy could ride it in heaven… oh I was seriously boo-hooing!) So touching.
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