When I woke this morning, I felt a footstep further away from death. Until that moment, I was tiptoeing towards death. Today was better, not great, but better. Tonight, however, every time I cough, my temples throb with pain. And I can barely type due to a pool injury. Last night, Babygirl wanted to go to the bathroom at the pool. (I have to admit that the very first day at the pool, I suggested to her that she pee in the pool. She’s tiny. She has a small bladder. The pool is large and full of chemicals. Urine is sterile.)
She would have none of that. Some days, we traipse around the pool and into the slickly tiled bathroom and tug down her swimsuit repeatedly. Five or six times we do this, but yet, no output. Last night, the toilet seat was wet. I reached into the toilet paper dispenser to get a wad to wipe the seat. I recoiled in pain–something sharp sliced a quarter inch wound on the tip of my finger. (Oh, and Babygirl didn’t bother to actually pee after my Incident.)
It bled and bled. Today it doesn’t bleed, but it hurts, especially when I type. The pain distracts me from my headache. It turns out that you use the letters “D” and “E” with painful frequency when typing in English.
We just found out tonight a bit of ludicrous, yet greatly welcomed news. When we travel to Houston (a glorious town!! a lovely delightful hot spot in our country!! yee-haw and show me the cowboys!!) in a week or so, we will be staying with my husband’s stepsister and her husband. They are our age, yet she had the good fortune to give birth while in high school (look Mom, no Texas jokes) and so she is a grandmother already with an empty nest. We will descend up her empty nest and make ourselves at home because she and her husband, along with my husband’s dad and stepmother, will be out of town for the entire week we are in town. More than a week, actually.
Ha ha ha ha ha cough cough cough cough ouch ouch ouch my head! Cough sputter sneeze.
Oh. Where was I?
My husband has four more siblings and their assorted spouses, ex-spouses, nieces, nephews, and two other sets of parents (don’t ask–it’s really a very complicated story), so we’ll have plenty of in-laws and out-laws to visit. But we’ll do so from the privacy of the house we’ll be living in, alone, how-can-you-not-believe-in-God-when-He-is-so-good-to-me?, introvert-heaven.
The funny thing–okay, maybe not funny ha-ha, but funny-pathetic-sad-and-typical, is that the Very Important Event keeping my sister-in-law and parents-in-law from staying in town is a church-related event. My husband’s parents have always, always, always put church events before family. Always. His brothers rebelled against the church for this very reason. His mother left his father for this very reason. I know it hurts my husband’s feelings, just a bit, that his family (just this portion of his family, but still) can’t put aside the annual church thing for our benefit.
I have only been to Texas twice during my 18-year marriage. My two younger children have never been. The twins have only been once. This is almost a once-in-a-lifetime event. (Do you know how much it costs to fly from Seattle to Houston? Yes, a lot!)
Oh well. My husband thought our dates would avoid the church-thing–plus we had to work around our school vacation and other summer activities.
I can’t tell you how relieved I am to know that most of our trip will take place without the awkwardnesss of living with relatives. I have been so worried about how we’d manage. I need a reasonable amount of quiet time a day. Or I get a little snippy.
Tomorrow is the last day of school. YoungestBoy only has a half-day. I asked him, “What do you think we should get your teacher?” I suggested a gift card to a bookstore. (That’s what I’d like.) He said, “No, I want to get her something pretty.” I said, “Like what?” He ran across the room and pointed to my Spode Christmas Tree pattern cookie jar in the china hutch. “Like that!” he said.
I love that this kid has such a definite mind of his own. I found a little ceramic thing at Hallmark–I can’t really describe it, but it’s a kind of pretty bank for adults. He thinks it’s pretty. (It cost $2.95 on sale!) I added a set of fragrant candles and a card.
And so ends another school year. Summer will come and go in a flash and hopefully, by then, I’ll be able to breathe through my nose again.
Actual Unretouched Photo 
I know what you mean about staying w/relatives. I try to stay in a hotel, when we can. It’s just easier than trying to explain why you have to do things a certain way for your child’s comfort or your own sanity.
LikeLike
My Grandparents are like that with the church thing. If the doors are open you should be there. And isn’t it always the churches with the hour and a half services? Hope you feel better.
LikeLike
I would be doing the “happy-happy, joy-joy” dance for not having to live with relatives while on vacation. lol. Shoot, I’m dancing it for you!
LikeLike
Did it ever occur to you, Ms. HM, that your little pool injury occurred because The Man Upstairs, The Big Cheese, The Dude With No ?Tude is NOT convinced that you have good thoughts about our little city on the bayou? Hmmmm? Now, HE is being nice to you and giving you a lovely respite in our fine city and HE HOPES (of course he already knows so you can?t be deceivin? about it) you will return to your faux Yankee city with GLOWING REVIEWS of the place where GEORGE and BARBARA BUSH call home. Mmmmmkay?
How unfortunate that it?s painful for you to type the letter ?E?. Wow. Interesting that the letter ?E? gives you a wince. Who?d a thunk the little ol? letter ?E? would give you pause. Sucks to be you when it comes to the letter ?E?.
Have a lovely time in Houston. Remember, it?s not the heat, it?s the humidity.
LikeLike
I think it’s odd that the other day Hillary continually had ? in the place of ‘. Now Elizabeth does…Hmmmm…
Have fun on your trip!
What on earth sliced open your finger?
LikeLike
It’s true! It’s true! Good God in heaven it’s tru..hoo…hoo. Hillary and I are *da dum da dum da dummmmmmm* THE SAME PERSON *wah wha wha oooowwweeeeoooo*
Yes, I am a pathetic loser who must post under different names so I can at once tell my blog hostess what an incredible not-nice person she is while simultaneously staying on to continue with my commenting brilliance. It was PERFECT. Per-er-er-er-fect!! And now, it is all over! I’m done. Kaput. Found out. I feel sooo….ASHAMED.
Um…actually Hillary and I apparently do the same thing and that is we write our comments in Microsoft Word and then paste them into the little comment box. Why? Because I don’t like typos. I really hate them. I can’t stand reading a comment I’ve made and seeing a typo. It drives me CRAZY! But, I haven’t done it with this comment. Let’s see if the ?s appear….if there is a typo I just might have to end it all. I’ll be sure and blame you, Christi.
LikeLike
I hope you get to feeling better soon!
LikeLike
I know what you mean about staying w/relatives. I try to stay in a hotel, when we can. It’s just easier than trying to explain why you have to do things a certain way for your child’s comfort or your own sanity.
LikeLike
Great news about the house!
LikeLike
My Grandparents are like that with the church thing. If the doors are open you should be there. And isn’t it always the churches with the hour and a half services? Hope you feel better.
LikeLike
I would be doing the “happy-happy, joy-joy” dance for not having to live with relatives while on vacation. lol. Shoot, I’m dancing it for you!
LikeLike
Did it ever occur to you, Ms. HM, that your little pool injury occurred because The Man Upstairs, The Big Cheese, The Dude With No ?Tude is NOT convinced that you have good thoughts about our little city on the bayou? Hmmmm? Now, HE is being nice to you and giving you a lovely respite in our fine city and HE HOPES (of course he already knows so you can?t be deceivin? about it) you will return to your faux Yankee city with GLOWING REVIEWS of the place where GEORGE and BARBARA BUSH call home. Mmmmmkay?
How unfortunate that it?s painful for you to type the letter ?E?. Wow. Interesting that the letter ?E? gives you a wince. Who?d a thunk the little ol? letter ?E? would give you pause. Sucks to be you when it comes to the letter ?E?.
Have a lovely time in Houston. Remember, it?s not the heat, it?s the humidity.
LikeLike
Soooo… lemme get this straight… Your husband — the pastor — manages to break away from his responsiblities (and we KNOW how busy he usually is) long enough take a once-in-a-decade trip back to Houston…. his father, sister and stepmother have NEVER seen his two younger children…. he’s a pastor who has taken a vacation from his church (that’s so significant in this scenario, I thought I’d mention it twice)…. and his family can’t foresake an event that happens annually in order to spend time with him… and his wife (that’s you, Mel)… and the twins they haven’t seen since they were navel-high… and the two children they’ve never seen.
Did I get that right? Because if I did, I may need to fly to Houston, sit some folks down and ‘splain how this family thing oughta work.
~CA~
LikeLike
I think it’s odd that the other day Hillary continually had ? in the place of ‘. Now Elizabeth does…Hmmmm…
Have fun on your trip!
What on earth sliced open your finger?
LikeLike
It’s true! It’s true! Good God in heaven it’s tru..hoo…hoo. Hillary and I are *da dum da dum da dummmmmmm* THE SAME PERSON *wah wha wha oooowwweeeeoooo*
Yes, I am a pathetic loser who must post under different names so I can at once tell my blog hostess what an incredible not-nice person she is while simultaneously staying on to continue with my commenting brilliance. It was PERFECT. Per-er-er-er-fect!! And now, it is all over! I’m done. Kaput. Found out. I feel sooo….ASHAMED.
Um…actually Hillary and I apparently do the same thing and that is we write our comments in Microsoft Word and then paste them into the little comment box. Why? Because I don’t like typos. I really hate them. I can’t stand reading a comment I’ve made and seeing a typo. It drives me CRAZY! But, I haven’t done it with this comment. Let’s see if the ?s appear….if there is a typo I just might have to end it all. I’ll be sure and blame you, Christi.
LikeLike
I hope you get to feeling better soon!
LikeLike
Great news about the house!
LikeLike
Soooo… lemme get this straight… Your husband — the pastor — manages to break away from his responsiblities (and we KNOW how busy he usually is) long enough take a once-in-a-decade trip back to Houston…. his father, sister and stepmother have NEVER seen his two younger children…. he’s a pastor who has taken a vacation from his church (that’s so significant in this scenario, I thought I’d mention it twice)…. and his family can’t foresake an event that happens annually in order to spend time with him… and his wife (that’s you, Mel)… and the twins they haven’t seen since they were navel-high… and the two children they’ve never seen.
Did I get that right? Because if I did, I may need to fly to Houston, sit some folks down and ‘splain how this family thing oughta work.
~CA~
LikeLike
Ok, first: hope you’re better real soon. Dang!
Second: Spode? That boy has refined taste.
Third: When you get to Houston, head straight for Goode Company Barbeque. It’s on Kirby Drive. Good luck with the absentee relatives. I’d console myself with some nice brisket. Mmmmmmm….
LikeLike
Ok, first: hope you’re better real soon. Dang!
Second: Spode? That boy has refined taste.
Third: When you get to Houston, head straight for Goode Company Barbeque. It’s on Kirby Drive. Good luck with the absentee relatives. I’d console myself with some nice brisket. Mmmmmmm….
LikeLike
Um…I want to know how you are going to explain this to your kids!
My MIL missed my oldest son’s baptism because she had to wash her hair. Yes. Wash her hair. So, she sent him a card with twenty bucks in it.
Suddenly, my other two kids had religious experiences and also wanted to be baptized.
I’m at church everytime the doors are open, only because I am the one who opens the doors. (i see a pattern…i’m also at the fridge everytime that door is open too…)
Mel. This is REALLY REALLY weird.
I hurt for you. But, I’m also happy for you, as it seems like it will be more fun without them!
LikeLike
This post has been removed by a blog administrator.
LikeLike
Um…I want to know how you are going to explain this to your kids!
My MIL missed my oldest son’s baptism because she had to wash her hair. Yes. Wash her hair. So, she sent him a card with twenty bucks in it.
Suddenly, my other two kids had religious experiences and also wanted to be baptized.
I’m at church everytime the doors are open, only because I am the one who opens the doors. (i see a pattern…i’m also at the fridge everytime that door is open too…)
Mel. This is REALLY REALLY weird.
I hurt for you. But, I’m also happy for you, as it seems like it will be more fun without them!
LikeLike
This post has been removed by a blog administrator.
LikeLike