And One More Thing (Okay, Two)

I remembered this afternoon of a few things that scared me when I was a child.

I was afraid that if I used too much toilet paper, the toilet would overflow. I used four squares, no more, until I was no longer a scared child. In fact, I think I was married before I started using generous amounts of toilet paper.

I was afraid that I would slide between the outdoor stairs–you know the kind of stairs without backs on them? I was terrified of going up those kind of stairs. I knew I would fall straight through.

I was afraid to speak in Sunday School class because I never spoke on Sunday mornings before class started. I was afraid my voice would be all scratchy and choked.

I was afraid people were talking about me behind my back. I was afraid of being left out and of being different.

I was afraid that when I stepped into a boat–rowboat, yacht, motorboat–it would sink.

I was afraid that the center of the golf ball my brother had dissected would explode and kill us all.

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Just a while ago, I was sitting here in the family room, perusing blogs, when I realized that the television was blaring. I walked over, turned off Cartoon Network and resumed my reading.

A few moments later, YoungestBoy slid open the patio door, came in, looked around, turned on the television and went back outside.

He closed the door before I could say, “HEY! TURN THAT OFF!”

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My husband is gone overnight to officiate a wedding in Portland. I feel a little adrift, alone again. The skies have turned blue and I think I’ll take the kids to the pool tonight. It’s supposed to rain again next week and then the pool will be closed. I don’t want to don my swimsuit, but I will have to because Babygirl will insist on swimming with her beloved rubber ducky floating ring. She even sleeps with “ducky” now.

I am mourning the end of summer and the passing of time.

And now, Babygirl is screaming, “MOM! MOM!” from her crib. So, the second half of this day begins.