Sometimes I wonder what I’ve been doing with myself since November 28, 2017. That was the day my boss called and told me my job was over. I didn’t even finish my shift that day.

Originally, I thought I’d have time to clean out my home office, sort through books, organize files and drawers and really get my whole entire life alphabetized, once and for all.

Then I thought maybe I should sleep in every day and see as many movies as possible and read a lot and live a life of complete leisure.

But I had jury duty for two days.

Then I applied for a job I really wanted.

Then Christmas came and I had to shop and bake and decorate. I caught a cold.

The New Year arrived and I thought I might start working any minute. So I filled up my days with some part-time free lance gigs and regular mom-stuff like driving kids around and figuring out what to cook for dinner. My husband caught a cold, then left the country for ten days and while he was gone, I suffered with the cold.

So I was sick for three weeks with a stupid cold.

My birthday came and went. February arrived. I thought I might be working at any moment. I caught another cold. March came. I caught another cold.

Every month, I’d take another baby step toward getting the job I really wanted. I applied. I went to an initial meeting, then took a computerized skills test called CritiCall which took 3 hours.  I had an oral interview. And finally, I was “selected” which meant I entered the long and arduous background check. I had a polygraph test. I was fingerprinted.

And finally, Saturday morning, I received an email telling me the date and time to appear at the Department to get my job offer.

That’s tomorrow.

And so I wonder what I’ve been doing these four months.  I haven’t organized every detail of my life. I still have stacks of books and unnecessary paperwork and a pile of unclaimed clothing in the laundry room and unmatched socks in a basket. There are embarrassing cupboards in my kitchen.

I did watch all the movies nominated for an Academy Award this year.

I kid you not–I alphabetized my spices.

I emptied a giant file drawer and gave away a Barney (the dinosaur!) DVD, among other things that I emptied from a moving box directly into that drawer in 2011.

I went to Disneyland a few times.

I watched all five seasons of Breaking Bad and then listened to an entire podcast about it.

I did my taxes, my son’s taxes, my other son’s taxes and my mother’s taxes.

I cleaned out my closet and took five bags of clothes and shoes to Goodwill.

I’ve read a couple of books.

I finally filled two Legacyboxes with old prints and videos. I had those boxes sitting around for years and years, waiting for me to finally take action.

Now I can pop in a DVD and see myself thirty years ago, holding the arm of my dad as he walks me down the aisle. I can pop in a different DVD and see myself five months pregnant fifteen years ago. I can see my 15-year old daughter on the very day she was born. I can see my 20-year old son sitting on his brothers’ bed playing Nintendo when he was four years old.  He’s wearing cotton pajamas and rubber boots and a backpack like Zelda.

This blog and those DVDs are like pulling on a pair of backwards glasses that allow me to see all the yesterdays that I had forgotten.  That’s why I’m writing this blog again, even though this mundane details may seem boring to anyone else who stumbles across it.

The words I write today are a gift to my future self.

I write so I can remember.

After I wrote that last blog post, I went back upstairs to bed, only to have my dumb dog wake me again.

So then I pulled on my fleece robe and fell down the stairs.

By “stairs” I mean one stair or maybe two. It was dark and late. And shocking.

I missed the step somehow. I landed solidly on my right knee but luckily enough, went back to bed with only a stinging rug-burn type pain and no broken ankle or fractured pelvis or shattered kneecap.

When morning came, I woke up early and drove down to San Diego for my appointment.  I arrived in the parking lot a full thirty minutes before my appointment, then waited fifteen minutes after my appointment time for the man to lead me to his office whereupon I realized that I had failed mightily.

I had completed the 30-something pages of information but did not get a particular form notarized as I had been instructed.  He said, “I can’t touch any of the packet until that form is notarized.”

And then he sent me on my way with instructions to call back to make another appointment after I have the form notarized.

All in all, I wasted his time and mine. That was one week ago. I still don’t have the form notarized.

*

Yesterday, I was hiking the nearby trail at about 8:30 AM and a phone call interrupted the podcast in my ears.  I answered the call and it was the detective I have been working with for a different job. He was calling to tell me that the background investigation was complete and that I should expect to receive a job offer.

There’s still an in-person meeting (where I’ll receive the actual offer) and a psych evaluation and a medical examination but I do believe that I’m actually going to be hired.  It’s been almost four months since I originally applied for the position.

(I wish I knew what I’ve been doing with all that leisure time since I was laid off other than watching the entire five seasons of Breaking Bad. How can an unemployed person be so busy?)

The end.

(That’s how you end a blog post when you are tired and you can’t think of a nice way to wrap up what is essentially a diary entry.)

UPDATE:  I remembered how I meant to end this post.  I was going to end it by telling you that after I got that phone call at 8:30 AM while hiking, I realized that the reason my pants felt weird was that I was wearing them backwards.  Ha.