Ten Reason I’ll Never Win Mother of the Year

1) I hate playing board games.

2) My ten year old son who excels in all areas of his life still cannot tie his shoes.

3) I roll my eyes at my children. (My mother was right: they did get stuck that way.)

4) I tell my kids baked goods have nuts in them to dissuade the children from partaking. Even if no nuts are involved.

5) My fantasy weekend involves my children being absent from my house, while I am home alone.

6) I hardly ever read books to my five and a half year old. I KNOW! I am doomed, she is doomed. We are all doomed.

7) I do not hug enough, apologize enough or praise enough.

8) Unlike a Mother’s Day commercial I just heard, I do not give 100% of myself at all times to my children.

9) From time to time, I put myself first. Okay, more often than from time to time.

10) I hog all the ice. I can be heard saying, “DO NOT USE ALL THE ICE! I MEAN IT!”

20 thoughts on “Ten Reason I’ll Never Win Mother of the Year

  1. And all this time I thought I was the only one. I felt so completely overwhelmed at church as the pastor talked about the privilege and responsibility of motherhood – how we sow into the future every day – that I just broke down under the weight of it all!

    And I like playing board games – it’s the other games, like Barbies, that I’m no good at. I can’t imagine a darn thing when that stuff is out!

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  2. You are so not alone on that!

    Board games are okay, so long as they don’t need help to play and don’t require an hour to set up. I hate video games.

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  3. Well… now ya know!

    I hate “bored” games! But I play them when necessary, as in no other option in the whole world, which is unfortunately frequent as we have no tv.

    Oh, my dd is 12 and cannot tie her shoes well enough to stay tied for 10 seconds. She can only make one loop in her bow.

    I started hugging, praising and apologising more when my oldest left home and I finally realized just how short childhood really is. Right now you don’t see it, but you will.

    A secret… Every mom’s fantasy weekend involves no kids! And maybe no husband either!

    I have always been jealous of your free Saturdays.

    Love ya!

    Mary in TN

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  4. I hate board games.

    I sneer at my children when they’re not looking.

    My best vacations when my kids were young was when my husband took them camping and I got to stay home.

    I’ve never understood moms who say, “I NEVER buy anything for myself. It’s always for the kids.” (really?)

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  5. Mel you just make me laugh! I dont relate at all to what you’re saying but you are way ahead of others who cant admit this stuff.

    I happen to love being with my kids and cant stand vacations without them. I do however look forward to a few hours alone with my girlfriends now and again.

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  6. Thank you for keeping it real and down to earth! I’ll never be elected Mother of the Year either, but I won’t admit why!

    Can anyone ever hug, apologize or praise enough??? A good reminder to me to hug my kids just a little longer and find any reason to praise. I’ll work on the apologizing part, too, which isn’t as fun.

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  7. Hee hee hee, I just posted on my blog last night about what a bad mommy I am, too! (My ritual apparently seems to involve making my child cry at bedtimes)

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  8. Heh. You are not doomed. I do not read a lot to my kids. Know what? They pester other people to do it. My kids are known as the Book Worms and I get praised all the time for their love of books. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

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  9. However, my fantasy weekend involves a hotel suite. I do not want to be reminded of all the housework that must be done!

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  10. One of my reasons for not being the dad of the year is that I play too many video games with my son.

    He beats me handily almost every time. Little jerk.

    Oops, that’s reason #2. I called my son a jerk.

    I wish I were better than him (reason #3) so I could let him win from time to time and get some points back that way on the dad-o-meter.

    Plus it would be fun to beat him handily (aw, nuts — that’s reason #4).

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  11. My kids wanted to know why I was laughing out loud so hard. The nuts thing is hee-lareous.

    I hate board games, too. Have you ever cheated to lose quicker so it can be over???

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  12. Are we the same person? Ok, I’m good with board games and no nut allergies in our house but the rest…well it is just uncanny. Especially the ice part…(grin)

    My son is 8 and you just made me feel a whole lot better about tying his shoes every day…

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