If I were a boat, I’d be a sailboat in the doldrums. I’d be floating in a calm sea of fog, dry land out of sight, sun veiled behind gauzy clouds, carrying only stale granola bars and tepid drinking water.
If I were a ball, I’d be tethered to a pole cemented into an old tire. No one would even come by to smack me and watch me bump into the pole. No quick games of volleyball for me. Just dangling listlessly.
If I were a tree, I’d be a white birch, my branches extended while all my leaves dead and gone. No shade under me, no shelter from storms, just immobile, helpless to keep dogs from peeing on my trunk. I can’t even scratch my nose.
I’ve been casting about, trying to come up with a flash of brilliance or a chin-stroking, eye-squinting, thought-inspiring topic, but I am listless. Both listless in the classic, dictionary-defined sense of the word and listless as in devoid of lists. I ought to make a list or two and check it twice. I need to get a pulse–stat!–before the Good Housekeeping Police come and carry me away in a body bag.
Actual Unretouched Photo 
I really do read your blog… honest I do, I’ve just been really bad about commenting. I’m a stingy commenter lately. Anyway, listlessness seems to go with being a mom… what to do?
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Forget brilliant. You’re metaphors for lack of same are … well … brilliant.
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Posts like this are what keep me coming back. 🙂
Awesome.
Suzanne
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Quickly, get into thee some Vitamin B!!!!
Awesome post.
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I love your blog. I read it every day. It is an inspiration. All I have to do is go to a job for 8 hours
and I wonder how you do all you do. Do you pray a lot?
(the adventures of Babygirl make me laugh out loud!)
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Only you could make having nothing to write about sound so good!
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Lovely post… I’ll try to keep the dogs from peeing on you! 🙂
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I really do read your blog… honest I do, I’ve just been really bad about commenting. I’m a stingy commenter lately. Anyway, listlessness seems to go with being a mom… what to do?
LikeLike
Forget brilliant. You’re metaphors for lack of same are … well … brilliant.
LikeLike
Posts like this are what keep me coming back. 🙂
Awesome.
Suzanne
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Golly do I know how you feel…
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Quickly, get into thee some Vitamin B!!!!
Awesome post.
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I love your blog. I read it every day. It is an inspiration. All I have to do is go to a job for 8 hours
and I wonder how you do all you do. Do you pray a lot?
(the adventures of Babygirl make me laugh out loud!)
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Only you could make having nothing to write about sound so good!
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Lovely post… I’ll try to keep the dogs from peeing on you! 🙂
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Golly do I know how you feel…
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That is precisely just how I feel. Thanks for saying it so well.
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That is precisely just how I feel. Thanks for saying it so well.
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Who told you that there is a Good Housekeeping Police force?
That’s just a figment of your guilt and there is no such thing 🙂
This is an AWESOME post, btw.
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Who told you that there is a Good Housekeeping Police force?
That’s just a figment of your guilt and there is no such thing 🙂
This is an AWESOME post, btw.
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oh my goodness!!i haven’t read anything as good as your blog yet..
you are just a really great writer and yr “chronicles” make such interesting reading!
i’ve been reading portions of yr previous posts and i’ve been rivetted to yr blogs for more than 3 hours..
babygirl’s so precious..
i read one of yr posts where you say you felt so lonely (since you left yr board) and i felt i could relate to that..i’m 23 and i know i have no real friends and feel so lonely (sometimes thats not a bad thing) and i felt u needed a {{{{BIG HUG}}}} right then..so here goes!{{{{{{{{MEL}}}}}}}}}
you’ve given me a new reason to be online!
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oh my goodness!!i haven’t read anything as good as your blog yet..
you are just a really great writer and yr “chronicles” make such interesting reading!
i’ve been reading portions of yr previous posts and i’ve been rivetted to yr blogs for more than 3 hours..
babygirl’s so precious..
i read one of yr posts where you say you felt so lonely (since you left yr board) and i felt i could relate to that..i’m 23 and i know i have no real friends and feel so lonely (sometimes thats not a bad thing) and i felt u needed a {{{{BIG HUG}}}} right then..so here goes!{{{{{{{{MEL}}}}}}}}}
you’ve given me a new reason to be online!
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