Ten Ways I Annoy My Husband (Without Really Trying)

1) I have purchased exactly one plunger, which may or may not be located near the toilet currently overflowing. (We have three toilets, one plunger, a 3:1 ratio, obviously not efficient.)

2) I leave wads of crumpled used tissues on my bedside table. What can I say? I have allergies.

3) At least once a month, eager for an evening snack, he pours cereal in a bowl, opens the fridge and finds . . . no milk. This is highly disappointing to him.

4) I leave shoes out, under the dresser, near the bed, wherever. I can’t be bothered.

5) I insist on doing things My Way (aka The Right Way), things like loading the dishwasher and packing correctly for trips.

6) I turn down corners of the magazines he leaves in the bathroom so I can pick up where I left off.

7) Clutter.

8) I mock his heritage by using an improbably bad Southern accent.

9) I talk to him during “important” portions of shows he’s trying to watch.

10) I don’t get out of bed when the alarm rings. I’m a three-hits-to-the-snooze-button kind of girl.

Ten Ways I Annoy My Husband (Without Really Trying)

34 thoughts on “Ten Ways I Annoy My Husband (Without Really Trying)

  1. When I pour a bowl of cereal and find no milk…disappointed would be putting it mildly. Fortunately, I eat cereal rarely and never in the morning…only as a bedtime snack.
    As for the rest of your list, I suppose if I were to make a list, it would look similar so I can’t sympathize too much.

  2. Emily says:

    Ahhh….#9 would be on D’s list of petpeeves. He now so kindly yells out “dialogue” during his shows. Ha! Like that works for me, it’s evening, I still haven’t used up all my words for the day!

  3. Anonymous says:

    I got your blog from my sisters. I love how you write!! I am glad to hear that I am not the only one that has problems with toilet plunger problems!! After my husband yelling for 7 years I have finally equipped both bathrooms with all supplies to help in a emergency!!

  4. Anonymous says:

    New reader here with a Total light bulb moment here, it never ever occured to me you could BUY more than one plunger for a house!!!! I admit to #’s 2, 3, and 10. (age 44, 3 kids – 19 yrs, 15 yrs and 2 yrs) I will SO be back, you rock.

  5. When I pour a bowl of cereal and find no milk…disappointed would be putting it mildly. Fortunately, I eat cereal rarely and never in the morning…only as a bedtime snack.
    As for the rest of your list, I suppose if I were to make a list, it would look similar so I can’t sympathize too much.

  6. Emily says:

    Ahhh….#9 would be on D’s list of petpeeves. He now so kindly yells out “dialogue” during his shows. Ha! Like that works for me, it’s evening, I still haven’t used up all my words for the day!

  7. Anonymous says:

    I got your blog from my sisters. I love how you write!! I am glad to hear that I am not the only one that has problems with toilet plunger problems!! After my husband yelling for 7 years I have finally equipped both bathrooms with all supplies to help in a emergency!!

  8. Anonymous says:

    New reader here with a Total light bulb moment here, it never ever occured to me you could BUY more than one plunger for a house!!!! I admit to #’s 2, 3, and 10. (age 44, 3 kids – 19 yrs, 15 yrs and 2 yrs) I will SO be back, you rock.

  9. Based on your list, I can assure you that you would also annoy my husband… how do I know this you ask? Because change the southern accent to Romanian and I’m already annoying him in all those ways for you. :)

  10. My wife once vaccuumed during the Packers-Vikings game. The next day I retaliated by relating a very long, boring story, complete with sound effects, during American Idol (or whatever it is she was watching). We get along well.

    Good list, fun blog!

  11. Based on your list, I can assure you that you would also annoy my husband… how do I know this you ask? Because change the southern accent to Romanian and I’m already annoying him in all those ways for you. :)

  12. My wife once vaccuumed during the Packers-Vikings game. The next day I retaliated by relating a very long, boring story, complete with sound effects, during American Idol (or whatever it is she was watching). We get along well.

    Good list, fun blog!

  13. Okay, you would annoy me too…

    But I have to admit that I am just like you in 1,6,7. 10 would get you a whap on the arm to get out of bed (see 5). So maybe we are really kindred spirits after all.

  14. Okay, you would annoy me too…

    But I have to admit that I am just like you in 1,6,7. 10 would get you a whap on the arm to get out of bed (see 5). So maybe we are really kindred spirits after all.

  15. schauna says:

    I annoy my husband by snoring. I’m a beautician and sometime I work long hours. I commute one hour to work everyday so when it’s time to rest, I rest! I’ve tried the strips accross my nose but that does not help. So he’s driven to trample downstairs, in the middle of the night, to the garage for his helpful ear plugs. Amazingly, the only person that’s not bothered by it is me.

  16. Sharon says:

    Oh my God!!! I do everything you just listed to my husband!!! HAHAHA!! he actually thought I was the one that typed it out cause of the whole mock his southern accent thing, lol. You’re AWESOME!!!

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